A new study by the University of Washington finds that babies as young as 15 months can make assumptions about angry adults, and even try to avoid being on the receiving end of that anger.
A group of 15-month-olds were seated across from a researcher who showed them how to play with a set of toys. Another researcher then reacted to the researcher explaining the toys in either a neutral tone of voice, or an angry, frustrated tone. Then the children were left to play with the toys. Interestingly, the children who witnessed the angry researcher were less likely to play with the toys. The children were still hesitant to play with the toys when the angry researcher was brought back in but spoke with a neutral tone of voice. The hesitancy was likely a self-protective measure the children employed to avoid further angering the adult.
If you're yelling more often than not, here are some ways to help keep it in check:
- You're a parent, so naturally that means you have a lot of stress in your life. What sets you off? And no, it isn't the guy who cut you off, or the dog who chewed up your favorite pair of slippers. Anger usually stems from something deeper. When you feel your blood pressure beginning to surge, ask yourself what's really bothering you, what is really behind it, and write it down. If you keep a record of all the things that set you off, you may begin to see a pattern. If, for example, you start to see "work" come up a lot on your list, you might want to ask yourself if you're really happy at your job.
- Invest in some relaxation time. This can anything you do that relaxes you- yoga, meditation, prayer, reading, taking a bath. You owe it to yourself and your family to take some time to calm and center yourself.
- Learn how to breathe. Really breathe. If you're about to blow your top, try inhaling slowly for five counts, then exhaling slowly for five counts. Keep your thoughts focused on your breath and visualize a calming place. Do this periodically throughout the day to keep yourself on an even emotional plane.
- Take a walk. It's hard to be angry when you're outside and find yourself getting caught up in how beautiful the sky looks, or how wonderful it is to see the trees birthing their summer leaves. The benefits of being outdoors are well-documented, so when you feel like all your buttons are being pushed, duck out for some Nature time, even if it's only for a few minutes.
